It flashed up today,
This little reminder on facebook
‘It’s Gemma Garwood’s Birthday today.’
It technically isn’t,
Actually it’s the anniversary of my first day shouting as Falmouth’s Town Crier. Two years to the day when I first hit the streets back in Cornwall with my hat, the town bell and an intrepid bellow.
Back when I could stake a solid claim to that name.
I invested so heavily in it that I pinned the most popular performance of my career to date on it.
I put up with joke after joke about my husband working away because I was too loud…no wonder he wanted the distance.
Unfortunately in the end that was no joke.
Unfortunately in the end he did want the distance between us to remain.
He had filled it already with another person.
As, in time, would I.
We can only revel in our loneliness for so long, especially with the kind of social voracity I possess.
And I have begun to distance myself from that name.
Professionally I have already performed with another and will continue to do so. Personally that process must soon begin formally
At the same time as I am trying to keep
The extra family members I gained with it close.
To love someone for 15 years in the way that I do
And I have
Means loving their family too
An investment I am not able or wanting to undo.
So it is not mine
Gemma Abbott’s birthday
Today.
But I celebrate that character I built under another name.
She will make herself heard again
With her new name, in new places, for new times.
And she has given me a parting gift.
A very special set of skills declared in a bout of silliness.
We all know these are the best kind of bouts to have.
She led me to my fellow Unfamiliar who is helping me to build the structure of something weighty and wonderful.
She led me back to my smile again, to belly laughs and a replenished, revived and fearless heart, filled up again with love.
For my family and for my friends.
And ultimately for this person who has been fearless too, in the face of everything.
Who has been brave enough just to love me
Just as I am
Completely
Flaws and all.
So
Happy Birthday Gemma Garwood
It may be one of your last
But may it be filled with happy memories, high hopes and my thanks.
It was wonderful to know you.
You have been brilliant.